Posts by Ann Garvin
Where Do You Get Your Ideas?
Where do you get your ideas? It’s come to my attention lately that people are concerned about me. The concern isn’t health-related—my body is the best thing I’ve ever gotten for free. Occasionally, however, I do joke about my relationship status and I realize they are concerned because I’m single. I often regale listeners with…
Read MoreI’d Like to Introduce You to Some Wonderful Women
I’d like to introduce you to some wonderful women. But first, a story. Erma Bombeck spoke at my college graduation. This is how her speech began. “Hello. I know you’re nervous about school ending and are filled with anticipation for the future and grief for leaving behind your loved ones. I know you’re worried you…
Read MoreThe Soft Animal of Your Body
The Soft Animal Of Your Body, I don’t go on vacation. I often joke about it and say, “I don’t know how not to work.” My parents straddled the silent and boomer generation–traditionalists who valued hard work, frugality, and discipline. I watched and learned, my friends. I’m an excellent student. When I went from married…
Read MoreSneak Peek expires in one week.
Sneak Peek expires in one week. THERE’S NO COMING BACK FROM THIS. CHAPTER ONE: The Last Tug On A String I half-jogged, half-walked to catch up with my seventeen-year-old daughter, Robyn, at Chicago O’Hare Airport and all I could think about was how a person can disappear from their own life and not even know…
Read MoreWhat Does Dead Dad Think Now?
What Does Dead Dad Think Now? Fred Wertz, my dad, picked up every penny he saw during his daily walks. At a nimble eighty-six he’d swoop down mid-sentence and scoop up a penny, barely breaking the cadence of his step. If he walked without me my father would call to chat and report his found…
Read MoreHow a Slugfest Became a Lovefest
How a Slugfest Became a Lovefest You either love me or hate me. There’s no in-between. I’m not an in-between kind of person. I’m noisy and laugh too loudly. I’m jokey, and I tear up easily. I can be unconventional. But I’m a tender-hearted soul and I have a story to tell you about love…
Read MoreA Free Nutrition Book For Writers.
A Free Nutrition Book For Writers: Because butts in chairs are hard on hearts and butts. Instructions: Open up a new text on your phone In the To: section type the number 66866 In the text message area type garvin You will get a message from me Next, Put Your email in! You will receive…
Read MoreWhat’s The Difference Between Moving On and Letting Go?
What’s the difference between moving on and letting go? Oof, this is a biggie. Because I just did both and we need to talk about it. You might have feelings about what I let go of–I’d love to hear what you’ve let go of lately. I woke up on the morning of January 9th of…
Read MoreChapter One: Hear Me Out
Chapter One Hear Me Out (*Catch-up Here) Heather’s best friend Chelsea was a bloodhound for plot holes, fallacies, and faulty arguments. She could sniff out a rationalization before Heather could order a cold brew, throw it back, and formulate a rebuttal. Heather arrived early for their lunch date, sipping coffee and going over her talking…
Read MoreI’m Feeling A Little Sad For Men
Today I’m feeling a little sad for men. [Tweet “Today I’m feeling a little sad for men. Hear me out”] I admit I have taken my fair share of swipes at men over the years. I almost can’t help myself. Men are the low-hanging fruit of humor, mostly because they are so consistent. For example,…
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