Uncategorized
Day Dream Believer
Ann Garvin 2004 Official Participant Number: #130 Title: Daydream Believer Word Count: 1,400 This was her last Friday night, Dog & Suds, Arf and Barf, dinner-and-a-movie special at the Drive All Night Drive-In. No more wiener jokes; “Hey Jen, can I ride my baloney barge into your bun?” Goodbye, dick heads trying to cop…
Read MoreTrust Me On This
Trust Me On This Remember in High School, that girl, woman at your school that you couldn’t take your eyes off of? No one could, and like it or not, everyone saw her the way you did. Parents, teachers, the principal and every single boy or man in the school. I fault no one on…
Read MoreI’d Like to Introduce You to Some Wonderful Women
I’d like to introduce you to some wonderful women. But first, a story. Erma Bombeck spoke at my college graduation. This is how her speech began. “Hello. I know you’re nervous about school ending and are filled with anticipation for the future and grief for leaving behind your loved ones. I know you’re worried you…
Read MoreA Gentle Story Not a Sexy Story
A Gentle Story Not a Sexy Story I wish this was a sexy story about sexy things but it is not. Writing, binging sleep, and doing it all again the next day is decidedly not sexy. And, it’s a bit isolating if I’m honest. Daylight savings, cold weather, varients etc… keep a girl quiet and…
Read MoreWhat I did to feel better.
Today I want to tell you what I did to feel better. Home isolation has its ups and downs. One day you’re flying high and cleaning the baseboards with a Q-tip, and the next day you’re drinking tequila and watching squirrels out the window. There is no in-between. I didn’t create those two sentences (and…
Read MoreI Hugged Until I Couldn’t Anymore
I Hugged Until I Couldn’t Anymore. I’m a hugger. I like to hug. I typically, but not always, give a warning like, “I’m coming in for a hug.” There’s usually time for the huggee to get their arms up. But, again, not always. Sometimes it’s me hugging people the way a panda snuggles a bamboo…
Read MoreSexting And Other Accidents
Sexting And Other Accidents I’m single again.* Actually, it’s been over a year since my last relationship and my friends have made it clear that it’s time to pair up and shut up. Apparently, my tirades during the Bachelor about the show’s irresponsible perpetuation of the myth of true love are wearing as thin as the dignity…
Read MoreAnn Garvin 2019 Appearances
Ann Garvin’s 2019 Appearances It’s official I need a wrangler. Until then this will have to do. Please Come Sit By Me January 17 – 20 Pulpwood Queen Girlfriend’s Weekend Texas. http://www.thepulpwoodqueens.com/2019-girlfriend-weekend-program/ January 26 One-On-One Mentor Day With Ann-Madison, WI anniewertzgarvin@gmail.com January 27 Bloom-real time chat all day-Online https://www.facebook.com/groups/Bloomwithtpw/ February 7 One-On-One Mentor Day with Ann-Madison, WI anniewertzgarvin@gmail.com March 1…
Read MorePatch-ing Up After Loss
Patch-ing Up After Loss I woke up today, looked in the mirror and found my estrogen patch had migrated from my ass to my elbow. Sometime in the night my helping hormone swatch decided to relocate. Seriously you guys, my estrogen patch is so well meaning; I’ve been scattered and angsty and I think it’s…
Read MoreMy Beautiful Empty Nest is Magically Full
My nest is empty. Here’s the thing. I wish I had a file cabinet where I’d kept the years memorialized in flat-manilla folders. After the documented year, each tab would have a clever label for quick reference and future nostalgia. 1982-The Nanny Diaries. 1997-Thirty-six hours of labor. 2005 Teen-Sport Hell. This year would read: 2018…
Read More